Lenten reflections 2018 - 03



Sunday - Third week of Lent
(Exodus 20:1-17 1 Corinthians 1:22-25 John 2:13-25)


A woman - quite estranged from God, angry because she felt that He was not there to protect her when, she as a little girl, so desperately needed him - went on a weeks retreat. In one of her meditations she was asked to sit in the room of her heart. In the course of this experience she `saw' Christ there with her. She writes: ‘Jesus gazed round and took in all that made up me. He looked through all the treasures I held up to him and he appreciated the jewels of my life, and I was grateful, knowing full well the source of these gifts’.


‘He looked upon my love, goodwill, flames of truth, sacred moments, journeys of hurt and healing and his light grew as he steadily gazed at me. His countenance shone as love beamed through him lighting up the whole of my heart, leaving no shadow or shade. Then his compassion pierced the mists that covered the things I'd rather hide. With gentle purpose he searched them out: success, control, the need to impress others, forces that bind me. Yet another pile his gaze revealed - self-centredness, aloofness, lack of trust, apathy, despair, anger, coldness, unforgiveness, bad language. And still holding me in his gaze he said: `Thandeki, in me you do not need these. In our relationship there is no room for them.' Firmly, yet gently and without a trace of judgment, he asked: 'Thandeki, give them, each one, to me.' And so I placed into his wounded hands 'distrust' and wondered what he would do. He took `distrust', self deception, and all the other shadow areas, upon himself as on the cross, he took it into himself. The horror thereof pierced my soul in searing pain and bitterly I wept, crying out: 'No Jesus - don't! But he replied: 'Unless I do this you can have no part of me – you cannot drink of the water which will turn into a spring inside of you, welling up into eternal life.’

'I pleaded for forgiveness as one by one I handed everything over to him until all was done.

He knelt beside me and embraced me, holding me till the sobbing ceased. He breathed over me and I began to feel his peace penetrating and filling the emptied spaces within. In that moment of intimacy there welled up within - a deep sense of well-being - a cleansed and liberated feeling. Together we rose and gazed at each other, drinking in deeply the love of the other'. (Little Girl Arise - Umlilo)

The writer of Exodus reminds us of the ways in which we need to act as God’s people. This we can do when we tap into the Fountain of Water at the core of our being – that space where God resides. Today we are called to dig into our souls and hearts and let ourselves be seen, sinners and yet disciples, called to salvation and rejoicing. We are the living wells of God's divine presence, of his spring of love and healing. What attitude, mindset, unforgiveness prevents the Spring within to cascade forth in streams of life - not only for ourselves but for all those around us?

We know that God said: I do not want your sacrifices and fasting. Rather God whishes us to offer him to walk humbly, act justly and to love with compassion and kindness. 


Breath Prayer

(Jesus stands before you - what do I need to place inhis outstretched hands?) Bring to consciousness the thirst of my heart

I breathe in:    'Jesus, I place...... (whatever you called to mind) ....' 

I breathe out:     'Into your hands.'



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